I am creeping up on 30....It is bothering me so much more than I anticipated. But not just in the ways I'd expect. Like wishing I had taught myself better eating habits or wish I had paid more attention in school.Those are obvious conclusions. But I am starting to think more on my impact in life. My desire to give to the world, to see the world and my place in it. I am noticing the waste my family and I create, also the waisted time doing things that aren't important. And mostly our desires as consumers. I feel my husband and I are really good at living for the moment and that is a great thing in that you enjoy your little moments and remember them. BUT we have often placed ourselves in after effects of our decisions when we could have planned better if we looked to the future more. I don't want to become some extreme version of myself living off nothing, saving every dime and never splurging on food or excitement. But I do want to make some simple changes in my life that just may affect my life in bigger ways than I even know. I'm really switching gears in my brain. I'm starting to worry more about my husband and my health more than ever before. I no longer just feel like I want to be the wife who has dinner ready and makes his lunches. I do that, but I also want to feed him mostly in ways that are meant to keep him healthy. Making that transition is so very very hard....Getting my husband on board is proving to be like getting a teenager to think an adult is right. He knows food can be unhealthy, and he knows we need to make changes, but he just wants me to do it all for him, and when I am struggling as much as I am myself... I really want him to join in my excitement to change ourselves for the better. I don't feel stuck in my life or anything like that, in fact I feel I have finally grown enough as a person to make change. I just don't know where to start. I definitely know it has to be baby steps. AND it has to be things we stick to. I'm sure some things we try will not work for us permanently, but in those cases I want to commit to trying to find another solution that will still improve our lives, health or finances. There r so many things I never finish. It makes my stomach hurt when I think about it. I think it is cause.....Well you know what....That is my problem right there. I think just cause there is a reason I am that way, that it makes it ok for me to feel it. And that is such bs excuse to keep being a lesser me. I have to do this. I have to make some changes. I'm excited but terrified at the same time. Mostly excited, I know my husband, I and our beautiful boy will be happy no matter what we do in our life, but changes still take some getting used to.
So what changes......I don't even know. ...I want to feed our souls more, I want to take more time out of the day to just learn. Learn about anything really, but just make my brain be working more. I hope to encourage us to make smarter eating habits. We love food, so no way , no how are we going to be eating diet food. But I'm hoping we can educate ourselves on what type of foods will help us to have energy and feel good, but still taste yummy. My son is 2 and a half and I feel like he is at a critical point. He is really starting to notice what mommy and daddy, eat and do all day. And I want him to want for so so so much more in life than playing on computers and being a lop (not that is all we do, but it's a chunk of it). The thoughts in my head about all this are endless, it is consuming me so much lately that I feel I have to move forward , like every part of me is telling me so. I have had a lot of really bad years in my first 30 on this earth. Over the last 5yrs or so my life has been getting better and better, I have become stronger and stronger as a woman and a person. I'm rethinking everything about what's important. Hope I can do this!!!
change of name.
So, If you are a follower of this blog, you can see that I absolutely suck at keeping up with it. BUT, I forge on and am not going to give up. See, that's my problem with things...I tend to start things and not finish them. Unless they are for someone else. This time however, I have decided to "adapt" instead of keel over and die. I am no longer "feeling Scrappy" especially since I haven't
"scrapped" in gosh knows how long. Instead I am "trying to keep up" because that statement is the truest statement that could be made of my life. I am a Mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a cook, a maid, a keeper of memories and a bitch when it all gets to be to much. Next year I will be 30 and I find myself caring about that fact much more than I ever thought I would. Age is just a number right? NO< it's not. 30.....I know to some of you it is silly to hear me speak this way of 30. It's not like I will be turning 90. In fact I JUST turned 29 last month. But 30 is one of those ages that signifies a place in life. By 30 you should have some shit figured out....Or at least they tell you that. But for me I am just starting to understand myself in anyway shape or form. I never realized how little I actually understood about myself. .....Well, you move forward. That's all you can do, in that spirit this blog will no longer be about one thing. It will be my therapy. If anyone chooses to read it well then great, and if not.... Hopefully I will be able to use it as a tool. For what , well I am not sure, But it will come to me... maybe.
Now I do enjoy a good laugh, and what I believe to be some good music, so you can expect things of that nature making there way on here. I will often rant Im sure as well as babble on and on and ....oh.
"scrapped" in gosh knows how long. Instead I am "trying to keep up" because that statement is the truest statement that could be made of my life. I am a Mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a cook, a maid, a keeper of memories and a bitch when it all gets to be to much. Next year I will be 30 and I find myself caring about that fact much more than I ever thought I would. Age is just a number right? NO< it's not. 30.....I know to some of you it is silly to hear me speak this way of 30. It's not like I will be turning 90. In fact I JUST turned 29 last month. But 30 is one of those ages that signifies a place in life. By 30 you should have some shit figured out....Or at least they tell you that. But for me I am just starting to understand myself in anyway shape or form. I never realized how little I actually understood about myself. .....Well, you move forward. That's all you can do, in that spirit this blog will no longer be about one thing. It will be my therapy. If anyone chooses to read it well then great, and if not.... Hopefully I will be able to use it as a tool. For what , well I am not sure, But it will come to me... maybe.
Now I do enjoy a good laugh, and what I believe to be some good music, so you can expect things of that nature making there way on here. I will often rant Im sure as well as babble on and on and ....oh.
Ever wonder what happened to Aladdin??
A short ad then the video will start, hope you get a chuckle...
New Blog my Husband and I created..
Hey all,
As you may have noticed, I have a sense of humor... well at least I think I do. My hubby and I love thrift stores and are always amazed by the unique items that grace the shelves. So in that spirit we created a new website. I would love for you all to check out and follow.
http://thriftstorewonders.blogspot.com
As you may have noticed, I have a sense of humor... well at least I think I do. My hubby and I love thrift stores and are always amazed by the unique items that grace the shelves. So in that spirit we created a new website. I would love for you all to check out and follow.
http://thriftstorewonders.blogspot.com
Funny Funny
Another funny video that I thought might make you all chuckle. Again, there will be a quick 30 second commercial then the video will start. Hope you like!
My Art makes me Happy
I have been actively taking landscape and art photographs since my 8th birthday when I got my first camera , a 110. I used to just load up my car and drive to the country or a really cool cemetery and take pics of all kinds of beautiful things. But now with my son I am mostly being his personal paparazzi, so last month whenI was able to snap this pic it made me happy inside. This is my first LO that doesn't have pictures of people in it. TFL
The Landlord
Ok, this is a few years old, but I'm betting a lot of you have never seen it. If you like WIll Ferrel and Cursing babies this is hysterical. Just pause my music on the right side of the blog first. Soooo funny:-p
The Landlord from Will Ferrell
Some of my favorite websites
I thought I would share with you guys some websites I find interesting or funny. Most of them have more adult content/humor to them so FYI.
http://postsecret.blogspot.com/ -Post secret was a social experiment a guy started where he asked people to submit anonymously their deepest darkest secrets and he gave them a release from it by posting it on his Blog. Well, it caught on and there has been several books of the "post-secrets" as well as tours he does all over. The secrets are updated every Sunday and can be light hearted or VERY dark so just know that. I think this website is an amazing look into others to see we are all defective, hopeful, scared, immature and it's o.k.
Http://notalwaysright.com/ - This is a great website if you work with customers or clients. It is about just what it says. The customer is not always right. People write out their stories of dealing with the not so bright or not so polite clients in a funny sense.
http://www.motherhooduncensored.net/motherhood_uncensored/ - This is a really funny and HONEST look on being a Mommy.
http://www.funnyordie.com/- Need a good laugh, this website is full of submitted hysterical videos and you vote if they are funny or should be put to death. The website is operated by Will Ferrel so it's that sort of humor. Again, adult content for sure. So if you are on the sensitive side , stay away.
http://www.i-am-bored.com/ - I am bored is just like it sounds, a place to go when you are bored. It is random photos and videos to give you a chuckle. Some of the stuff is adult content
http://www.cracked.com/ - Another place to go when you are bored. Celebrity news and jokes, funny pics and commentary on things.
Loosing my Mojo!
So lately I feel like I haven't had the time to scrap, and then when I do I just STARE at the pictures and can't decide what to do with them. I'm feeling a creative blockage!! So frustrating, so thankfully last night I had the time and a little bit of ability to crank a couple pages out.
:-)
I worked on this page for 3 days, I have never done that before. I could not decide what to do with it. This was my first time trying stitching. Man oh man, that takes a lot of patience. I don't have a lot of patience, but I think this turned out o.k.
Been caught up in the soon to be two's
So I haven't had a ton of extra time on my hands lately. My son is turning 2 next month and man oh man he is testing out the "terrible Twos" theory with all his heart. I have heard "NO mommy" more times than I would like to count. And have seen him knock the trash can over about 10 times more than that.
How did this happen. How did my sweet little boy become a monster!?! It is so hard. I try not to take it personal and tell myself that this is not a reflection of my mothering or of him. It is just him testing it all out to figure out who he is going to be. And how much we are going to let him get away with. I pep talk myself to stay strong and be consistent. That is the hardest part I think. Telling him "we don't do that, Here is what we do" about a million and one times in a day. How do you reason with a child too young to fully understand?.......But then it happens....you have said for the one billionth time "we don't shake our sippy cups liquid out all over the house!" and he lowers his cup and sets it down! EURIKA!!!! It finally gets through. We yell "Yay!! Good boy Good boy!" Like he just cured cancer in hopes the positive happy feeling is better than the "that's wrong" feeling. You take a deep breath and it gives you the strength to fight the next battle. But seriously, I KNEW being a stay at home mom would be hard. BUT DANG, it is so very hard. I have so much respect for all you mommys holding it together out there.
Some more laughs
This guy does a unique form of stand up. Very Funny. Again there will be a 30 second commercial before the video starts. Hope it makes you all laugh.
Hardy Har Har
This is an older SNL skit that I have always found oh, so amusing so wanted to share it with you all. Needing some laughs today..
There will be a short 30 second commercial then the skit.
Burning the Midnight Oil
So I haven't been scrapping much the last couple weeks because the Muse was just not there, and I don't like to force it cause then I end up with pages I am unhappy with. So last night as the hubby and I were going to go to bed the urge to scrap came full force. So while he slept peacefully I cranked out 3 pages not going to bed till well after 1 am. But here they are and I am happy with them. TFL
I MUST have this!!!
Sassafras has always been my absolute favorite line. But now they have gone and done it. Now they have absolutely stolen my heart and I will have to buy this kit and all its parts in triplicate to ensure I never run out. I LOVE this new Sassafras Monstrosity!!!!! This is just a sneak peak but it is supposed to come out this summer. I can't wait!!!!
Being a Mommy is the MOST amazing and difficult thing....
So, I just wanted to do a quick rant about some pressures society puts on Moms.....I HATE when people want to pretend like everything in their life is perfect. Being a Mom is a hard thing, especially when you are a new mom. I love being a wife and mother with all my heart, but it is challenging and pushes me to my limit at times. I question myself and my ability to be in charge of my son's life. Seriously, there are times I just feel like I am so ill equipped to do anything. ( Now that statement will split the group in two, those who say Yup been there, and others who have been there too, but would never admit it)But that is just the desire to be perfect for my family , which no one is. I do all I can, the best I can. I don't believe there is one right or wrong way to be Mommy. Society is wanting us to believe we can only feed our children "X" or you're a bad parent, they must participate in "X" or you're a bad parent, You must "X" or you're a bad parent..... I have 5 friends who are brand new mommies and they are exhausted and not asking for help. My heart goes out to them all. Society can make it seem so "wrong" to not know what to do. And that pisses me off. Admitting that you have fault and can be lost for what to do at times does not mean your children are in harm. Children need to be loved, fed, cared for and inspired in whatever manner works for you and your family. I am challenging myself to not beat up on myself anymore when it has been a tough day and I feel as though I failed. I am going to try and just view it as a new learning experience and hope I grow from it and tomorrow will be better. I want to be the best absolute Mom that I can be, and all I can hope for is that when my son grows up he will remember more of the good I did than the bad and he will feel loved and know how to give love in return. So if any of you are having a tough day I send you BIG hugs of support and know we have all been there at times, even if some won't admit it:-)
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